life is a JOKE!

This was included in our dean's lecture as an icebreaker.

Fine

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

Five Minutes

If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

Nothing

This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with Nothing usually end in Fine.

Go Ahead

This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

Loud Sigh

This is not actually a word, but it is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing.
(Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

That’s Okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s okay” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks

A woman is thanking you, do not question it or faint. Just say you’re welcome.

Whatever

Is a woman’s way of saying F**K YOU!

Don’t worry about it, I got it

Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but she is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?”

For the woman’s response refer to #3.

True? So true!

credits to: http://she-power.com/2008/04/21/a-little-funny-9-words-women-use

1. Unlike other people, you don’t refer to your Alma Mater as “Chinese Commercial.”

2. You wonder why they do.

3. You belong to a section that’s named after a fruit, flower, tree, or planet (a virtue if you’re from Ledesco.)

4. Your class resembles a mini- Philippines in that you have classmates from all over the country, and beyond.

5. You have at least one relative who’s also from ICCHS.

6. You are sick and tired of hearing “Diligence, Sincerity, Loyalty, Courage” (or its Chinese counterpart) over and over again.

7. For all you know, you don’t take it too seriously.

8. You have chanted “Hua shang wan suei! Hua shang wan wan suei!” countless times.

9. You have memorized all the Chinese holidays and festivals for the sole reason that you get to have no class.

10. Speaking of holidays, February 25 to you means more than just commemorating EDSA.

11. You have a weeklong vacation by then, but you end up dead exhausted preparing, rehearsing and performing in various activities.

12. You revere and worship Ty Sian like a demigod.

13. You refer to your Chinese teachers as “lao shi” or “sian si.”

14. When in a hurry, however, you merely call them “si”.

15. You communicate via sign language with newbies from Mainland
China.

16. Amazingly, you manage to understand each other perfectly well.

17. You always cajole them to give you higher grades.

18. You usually succeed!

19. You have been fined for speaking in the dialect in grade school.

20. You have been fined for transferring your seat in grade school.

21. In grade school, your notebooks are strictly 50- or 100-leaf ICCHS notebooks, with neat plastic covers and red 1-inch margins.

22. In grade school, you momentarily developed identity crisis from studying “Ako ay Pilipino” in Civics class, only to be followed by reciting “Wo shi zhong guo ren” in Chinese class.

23. You agree that the comfort rooms are a real problem.

24. The mini-dump area at the foot of Stair C is an even bigger problem.

25. You sometimes think canteen food is overpriced.

26. Writing pages of “xiao kai” during vacation break is a real killjoy.

27. You postpone doing it till the first day of classes.

28. You also hate writing “chok bun.”

29. You let someone do it for you.

30. You secretly write “kodigo” or “chu im” on your Chinese language textbook during oral or speech tests.

31. Signal No. 2 and Signal No. 3 typhoons mean nothing to you. Most probably, classes are still going to push through, anyway.

32. Guess what? They actually do.

33. You know what is meant by “Channel 11” and why it is prohibited.

34. You do it somewhere else!

35. You take pride in the dance troupe.

36. You cheer your lungs out during the Grand Rally.

37. You cheer even harder during the Intramural Games.

38. You cheer the loudest during the ILOPRISAA basketball games.

39. You usually end up the champion.

40. By the way, playing basketball on cement is perfectly fine!

41. You know that if you are on the second floor canopy during the Intramural Games, you can readily watch three matches at the same time –basketball, volleyball/badminton, and
table tennis.

42. You can also listen to a lecture in class with a program on full blast outside!

43. The Chinese Ambassador and the Chinese Consul-General are familiar faces during important events.

44. When they show up at the gates, you line the corridors with your classmates shouting “huan ying! huan ying!” and enthusiastically waving pieces of matching red crepe paper.

45. Your class goal is to win the annual Christmas Chorale Competition.

46. Another class goal is to win the quarterly General Cleaning Competition.

47. And speaking of cleaning, you sometimes escape your cleaning duties after class.

48. You get to clean for one week as penalty.

49. You fondly refer to the extension building as the “new building.”

50. You go to the library for reasons other than to read.

51. When late, you stretch your creative juices and write the most fascinating statements on your excuse slip.

52. The teacher does not usually believe them.

53. You have code names for all your teachers.

54. You consider three years of “hok bu” a waste of time.

55. You bring along notes and books to study at your assigned post when
the teacher-in-charge is not looking.

56. You know that the drinking fountain on the ground floor isn’t exactly for drinking.

57. Your cellphone occasionally rings in class.

58. The teacher, who noticed it, looks at you and raises one suspicious eyebrow.

59. You have perfected the art of cramming.

60. You regularly do your homework just before the intended period.

61. You know how hard it is to get an 85 just so you would qualify for honors.

62. Exemptions from exams are unheard of.

63. You easily survive without paper for the entire school year.

64. Solution: You just ask from your seatmate!

65. You suck at math in high school but you ace it in college.

66. You were never allowed to use calculators in Chinese math class.

67. In grade school, you twisted your tongue just to orally memorize the Chinese multiplication table within a time limit of 2 minutes.

68. You also have a vast expanse of memory space gleaned from years of memorizing lists of "chi di”, “bun tuey”, idioms and characters from ancient myths, stories and articles.

69. By now, you have forgotten all of them.

70. You detest going down for the flag ceremony on Mondays and Fridays.

71. You utilize the time to do a last minute review for the quiz moments after.

72. You have composed your own parody of the Alma Mater Song.

73. Hearing “If there are no more announcements, we can go back to our classrooms” from Ms. Annie Sy is music to your ears.

74. You know it is a mortal sin to go malling in uniform.

75. You do it anyway.

76. Your parents get a loving telephone call from the guidance counselor if ever you get caught.

77. You have heard different versions of ICCHS horror stories.

78. You have your own personal version.

79. Chinese songs are a part of your life and you know the popular ones by heart.

80. You have sung or listened to the Chinese versions of “Reflection” and “Yesterday’s Dream” at least once.

81. You invariably had the Junior- Senior Prom at the Amigo Terrace Hotel.

82. The Graduation Ball was held there, too.

83. You know which corridors get flooded by rain easily.

84. Recess time is always too short.

85. Lunch break is also too short.

86. You know what is meant by “major offense” and “minor offense.”

87. You avoid getting one.

88. Your blood boils when people mockingly chant “ching a chong a” behind your back.

89. You secretly curse them in Chinese!

90. “No ID, no entry” is a rule.

91. You have done practice teaching at least twice during fourth year.

92. You resemble a walking grocery store when you bring all sorts of food for “tao chia” purposes.

93. You share them.

94. When bored, you unknowingly scribble doodles on your desk.

95. The evidence is still there up to this very day.

96. You have a reputation to uphold when you enter college.

97. Once in college, you find that religion isn’t really your cup of tea.

98. You consider Jose Mari Chan and James Yap fellow alumni.

99. You slowly become nostalgic as you read this.

100.You are making the great countdown to the Grand Centennial in 2012.

101.You plan to attend the Grand Alumni Homecoming by then.

See you there! =D

you won't understand most if you're not from hwa siong..

I couldn't agree more sa mga statements..  kudos to the one who made this! taga hwas siong gid tuod..

Angelica: “Magsuswimming ka lang eh nakapadiamonds ka pa?”
Claudine: “Of course, diamonds are forever. And so am I.”

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Cherry Pie: “Ang ganda mo ngayon Katherine. Ang sarap mong patayin.”

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Claudine: “Pwede ba, pagod ako. Baka gusto mong ihampas ko to sa iyong bag ko na mas mahal pa sa iyo?”

Cherry Pie: “Wala akong panahong makipaghampasan. In fairness, and ganda ng damit mo ha. Pahiram naman ha kung minsan?”

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Scarlett: Kamusta kaya ang buhay being pampered with all this luxuries?
Catherine: Tumahimik ka, Scarlett. Nananahimik na ang buhay ko.
Scarlett: Anak niya ako; dugo't laman!
Catherine: Anak ka lang. Asawa niya ako. Lahat ng kanyang ari-arian, ari-arian ko na din!
Scarlett: You're just a gold digger in red!
(Scarlett attempts to slap Catherine, but Catherine tends to push Scarlett in the sofa, leaving Scarlett on the sofa panting)
Scarlett: DAMN YOU!
Catherine: (Softly, but fiercely) Same to you, anak...same to you.

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Scarlett: "Look who's here, my favorite step-mother. Ang dating gold digger in red, isa na ngayong merry widow in black."

==========

Scarlett: "Tapos ka na sa gold digger in red. Tapos ka na rin sa merry widow in black. Ngayon, baka pwede ka ng dirty mistress in dirty brown.”

==========

Scarlett: Ha ha Catherine, kung ako sa yo maghanda ka na...makukulong ka, tulungan pa kitang mag impake..hindi na pala nakahanda na ako..

ikaw na ngayon ang sad jailbird in orange!

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"Oo anjan n ako mare, ang hirap kasi maghintay ng taxi eh, ay ang ibig ko sabihin, magtataxi ako kasi pinahiram ko sa anak ko yong kotse ko.

(paparating ang mga pulis)

oh sige mare, anjan n ako, nakikita ko na yong building,,"

==========

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Isadora: "Walang hiya ka! Bakit mo pinasunog ang ospital?"

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Catherine: Oh yes!gud morning everyone, scarlet milya-milya naman talaga ang layo ko sayo nagdududa ka pa ba?

Scarlett: Hindi mo maaagaw sakin ang kumpanya, sakin to, sa pamilya ko to, sakin to!

Catherine: Nakuha ko na eh. ako na ulit ang bagong nagmamayari ng dela rhea foods,ako na ulit ang bagong presidente, ikaw naman kasi namihasa ka, sa kakaabsent mo, ginawa mong hubby yan. tuloy, malapit nang bumagsak ang kumpanya. nalusutan tuloy kita, through the back door.

Scarlett: Dyan ka naman magaling eh...backdoor,backstabbing,backbitting,
palibhasa ayaw mong ipakita yang pagmumukha mo dahil nababahiran na ng putik!

Catherine: Bago mo pansinin ang putik sa muka ko, tingnan mo muna yang pusali sa muka mo. tignan mo hndi na natatakpan ng mamahaling pabango mo ang nabubulok mong pagkatao! actually, umaalingasaw na nga eh!

Scarlett: Hindi ako ang naamoy mo, kung hindi ang naaagnas na katawan ng papa ko, minumulto ka dahil binababoy mo ang kumpanyang binuo nya.

Catherine: Kahit ano pang sabihin mo scarlet, wala ka nang magagawa,
kaya umalis alis kana dyan sa trono ko dahil nagbalik na ang tunay na reyna!